"Ass"tronomy

Sorry mom & dad... I couldn't resist!

If you like looking at a "moon"
May I suggest that someday soon
Try looking deeper in that "space"
To see a windy, gassy place
My favorite thing to do at night
Uranus is just really tight!

I always feel a happy gayness
Whenever I can view Uranus
A heavenly body- part of 8
But it's top 3, its mass is great
It's spread so far, out in the sky
You can see it with "one naked eye"!
I'm pretty sure that all agree-
Uranus is a sight to see!

I think that it would mean so much
If Uranus, one day, man could touch
Someday I'd like to take a ride
So I could probe around inside
A place they say "the sun don't shine"
I'd visit almost anytime!

But don't ask questions 'bout the things
That make up those mysterious rings
And just bend over now to grope
This long hard thing...
My Telescope! ;)

Star Struck

Sun is setting
And I'm waiting
Eagerly anticipating

He shows up 'round this time
Each night
Back from the Hunt
Back from the Fight

Brilliant
And Illuminating
Bright and always
Scintillating

The only man
I'll ever need
Upon his Belt
His trusty Steed

Sword and Shield
He holds in hand
My Supernova
Superman

His ever-present
Burning Flame
And Nebula
That shares his name

Loyal as his own
Canines
Fearlessly
My Hero Shines

It doesn't matter
Where I go
The constant
I'll forever know

My Champion
Of Fish and Bear
He'll always follow
Always there

Although at times
Obscured from view
I know he's out there
Ever true

'Neath his Blanket
Safe, surrounded
His mere presence
Keeps me Grounded

Enchanting me
With Starry Eyes
Protecting me
Beneath clear Skies

From the Bull
And from the Lion
Forever you are mine
Orion



In case you are unfamiliar with Astronomy:
"Upon his belt/His trusty steed" - Horsehead Nebula (near the Easternmost star on Orion's belt)
"His ever-present/Burning Flame" - Flame Nebula (part of the Orion Molecular Cloud Complex, with the Horsehead Nebula)
"And nebula/That shares his name" - Orion Nebula (middle "star" on Orion's sword)
"Loyal as his own/Canines" - Constellations Canis Major & Canis Minor
"Fish" - Constellation Pisces
"Bear" - Constellations Ursa Major & Ursa Minor
"Bull" - Constellation Taurus
"Lion" - Constellation Leo

Rollercoaster of...

You know perhaps it isn't smart
This ride's not for the faint of heart
But always thought you'd like to try
So step right up and don't be shy

You feel the sweat, your stomach churn
As nervously you wait your turn
Committed now, must take the ride
You can't turn back, you've got your pride

And willingly, you get strapped in
Excited for it to begin...

And then it starts, though somewhat slow
But soon it really starts to go
Not sure what to anticipate
You feel it rise and escalate

Then find yourself soon falling fast
The butterflies, you hope they last
Intensity, momentum build
You're overwhelmed, completely thrilled

You feel so high when you're on top
You're hoping it will never stop
But no idea what's in store
What lies ahead, you're never sure

'Cause after just a little time
You find it is an uphill climb
And suddenly it changes course
It's too intense, it feels too forced

All confused, no way of knowing
Which direction this is going
Feel dizzy, sick, and jerked around
Can't handle much more up and down

So disappointed, hurt, confused
Chest is aching, ego bruised
Overwhelming nauseous feeling
Heart is pounding, stomach reeling

And it gets worse 'round every bend
You just want off- when will it end??
When will the pain all go away??
The ticket's not the price you pay
If only sooner, had you knew
...But suddenly, you're finished, through

The other riders had such fun
It seems you are the only one
All broken-up and hurt inside
Was such a wild, bumpy ride

Just count it as a lesson learned
You played with fire, you got burned
Now that you're back on solid land
Regained your footing, and you stand

You're thoughts are clear, you know the way
.... A different partner, time of day...

A few deep breaths you take, and then
You find yourself in line again

... You know perhaps it isn't smart
This ride's not for the faint of heart...

Hate Your...

Although I don't like speaking ill
I must express now how I feel
Apologies, I know you're close
But they are horrid, nasty, gross

To hate is strong, so I've been told...
I'll need a word that's quite more bold
To tell you how much I abhor
How much I utterly deplore
An adjective to verbalize
Explaining how much I despise

Yet words wont properly address
That loathsome, nauseating mess
No single thing that I could say
Describes that frightening disarray

Unpleasant, ghastly, filthy, vile
Putrefaction mixed with bile

Repugnant, Raunchy, Rotten, Rank
Sleazy serpents topped with stank

Grotesque, offensive, quite obscene
Revolting, dreadful, rather mean

Monstrous, awful, vulgar, sticky
Beastly, ugly, grody, icky

It makes me think they must have lied
To say there's beauty found inside
You have a brain that's clearly smart
You're sweet and kind, I love your heart
And yet, I wish that you could lose
That festering heap of wretched ooze

What can I say, they drive me Nuts!
I'm sorry but I HATE YOUR GUTS!!!

Sea Sick

To find what I was searching for
They said I'd have to head off shore
And so I went to take a look
I casted out with baited hook
Naively, I dropped them a line
Had no idea what I'd find

'Cause while it's true- there are a lot
I'm unimpressed with what I've caught
And I've amassed here quite a stack
For me to fry up or toss back

Got some with fangs and some with scales
Got ugly ones with big, wide tails
The creatures you will see out here
Will leave you hopeless, full of fear

Stalkers and the fierce man-eaters
Suckers and the bottom-feeders
They're spineless, nearly all I've seen
Some snake-like, evil, serpentine
They lurk and wait out in deep dark
Electrocute you with their spark
They'll ogle you with beady eyes
Or trick you with their smooth disguise

Seem harmless, but then Up they blow
They puff out and their true spikes show
Everywhere, this place is flooded
Predators- they're all cold-blooded
They've got the size, the fangs, the fins
The sharpest smile that always wins

Blood-thirsty, violent carnivores
And stinging, vicious man-of-wars
Some loners, hermits, jerky crabs
Has weapons- swords- he cuts and jabs
His only care is his blowhole
Or breeding is his only goal

They're leeches looking for free-rides
They're barnacles glued to my sides
Their tentacles may only think
Of trying to get it down in ink
And better looking- I'd supposed
Not hammer-headed, bottle-nosed
The horses here- not nearly right
Not princely and not even white

The water's clear and I can see
That this is not a place for me
And while its true that there may be
"A Lot Of Fish Out In The Sea"

Each one that I have seen to date
Would be more useful on a plate,
Seen through glass in some large hall,
Or even mounted on my wall
When I get back upon dry land
I'll hit my knees and kiss the sand!